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I wish I was numb. I wish I was stronger. I wish I could stand up for myself, or just stand up to you. I wish I could express myself in a way that doesn't hurt me, I’m trying, I really am. I wish I could talk to somebody who would understand as a friend not as my Mom. I wish I had my friends back. I wish I had my cat back. I wish I had my life back when it was just us four. I wish I didn't feel guilty, maybe then I could do what is right for me. I wish I didn't feel like I was going behind his back. I wish I could do what my heart is telling me to. I wish I could scream. I wish I could fight for my life. I wish my heart would bleed out every pent up emotion. I wish I would cry all of these tears. I wish I couldn't cry, I wish I didn't have any emotions. I wish I was hallow. I wish I wasn't broken. I wish I was who I want to be. I wish I could just be alone, and feel at home.

I wish I wasn't falling apart.